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Man Jokes

How does a man show that
he is planning for the future?
 

Securing his future... One case at a time.

He buys two cases of beer. 

Why are blonde jokes so short?

So that men can remember them.
Duh...huh? 

How many honest, intelligent, caring men does it take to do the dishes? 

One of the two honest, intelligent, and caring men  Both of them. His twin brother

Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg? 

They don't stop and ask for directions.

Man-like, unwilling to ask for directions

How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?  

We don't know;
it has never happened. 

Unchanged by male hands...

What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? 

Where is my wandering boy tonight?

A widow.

Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and  good looking?

So happy together...

They already have boyfriends.

What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?     

They're married.  Wannabes at the Singles Bar

Why are married women heavier than single women?

Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.
Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge. 

Why Married Women Overeat
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